Emotional affairs can be more damaging to a relationship then an affair that involved pure sexual lust or a one night stand. The fact that the heart and deep emotions were involved often strikes the person who has been cheated on much harder than knowing the spouse just fell in bed beside someone once or a couple times. So, is it possible to actually save a marriage after an emotional affair has taken place?
It is the emotional aspect that makes this situation so unbearable. Couples move past physical affairs and one night stands rather quickly, but the knowledge that one spouse had a serious intimate connection to someone else is much harder to brush aside or talk away.
The first part of the journey lies with the spouse who actually had the affair. They must do some serious introspection to determine where their feelings truly lie. Is their heart still with this other person, or are their emotions for their spouse more intense? The emotions connected to the affair must be completely put out or at least seriously dampened if the marriage is to have a fighting chance.
If the connection of the affair has been broken, then the journey shifts focus to the other spouse.
Once the spouse that cheated has clearly stated that they want to save the marriage and are invested fully in doing so, it is up to the other spouse to open their heart and mind to that happening. They have every right to their own emotions, but in order for the union to survive they must be open to allowing trust to rebuild and new bonds to form within the couple.
Things will likely never be “normal” again after an emotional affair. Yet, if both people are actively working toward the future together then a new normalcy and an even stronger sense of happiness can come about in time. It will just require a period of time where both people work toward reconnecting, rebuilding a strong sense of trust, and becoming closer together again.
It is entirely possible to save a marriage after one person has experienced an emotional affair, but it must all start with open conversations. That doesn’t mean screaming and yelling, but genuinely talking and listening so that everyone is heard and understood. Only then will it be possible to move forward with action that makes it better.
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